Monday, January 31, 2011

C25K

I'm going to run a 5K in June. This is how I'm going to do it - using The Couch to 5k program, and the LoseIt! Website, journaling my food and exercise, limiting my calories.. doing what I can to get healthy. I realized the other day when I was picking up toys and was so pout of breath and my heart was pounding just from bending over and picking up toys from the floor (Repeatedly). So, here's the 9 week program to get to the 5k.

You can also get this (and the background of it all) at www.coolrunning.com


Week Workout 1 Workout 2 Workout 3
1 Brisk five-minute warmup walk. Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes. Brisk five-minute warmup walk. Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes. Brisk five-minute warmup walk. Then alternate 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking for a total of 20 minutes.
2 Brisk five-minute warmup walk. Then alternate 90 seconds of jogging and two minutes of walking for a total of 20 minutes. Brisk five-minute warmup walk. Then alternate 90 seconds of jogging and two minutes of walking for a total of 20 minutes. Brisk five-minute warmup walk. Then alternate 90 seconds of jogging and two minutes of walking for a total of 20 minutes.
3 Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then do two repetitions of the following:
  • Jog 200 yards (or 90 seconds)
  • Walk 200 yards (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 400 yards (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 400 yards (or three minutes)
Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then do two repetitions of the following:
  • Jog 200 yards (or 90 seconds)
  • Walk 200 yards (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 400 yards (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 400 yards (or three minutes)
Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then do two repetitions of the following:
  • Jog 200 yards (or 90 seconds)
  • Walk 200 yards (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 400 yards (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 400 yards (or three minutes)
4 Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:
  • Jog 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 1/8 mile (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
  • Walk 1/4 mile (or 2-1/2 minutes)
  • Jog 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 1/8 mile (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:
  • Jog 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 1/8 mile (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
  • Walk 1/4 mile (or 2-1/2 minutes)
  • Jog 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 1/8 mile (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:
  • Jog 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 1/8 mile (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
  • Walk 1/4 mile (or 2-1/2 minutes)
  • Jog 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Walk 1/8 mile (or 90 seconds)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
5 Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
  • Walk 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
  • Walk 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:
  • Jog 3/4 mile (or 8 minutes)
  • Walk 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
  • Jog 3/4 mile (or 8 minutes)
Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog two miles (or 20 minutes) with no walking.
6 Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
  • Walk 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Jog 3/4 mile (or 8 minutes)
  • Walk 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Jog 1/2 mile (or 5 minutes)
Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then:
  • Jog 1 mile (or 10 minutes)
  • Walk 1/4 mile (or 3 minutes)
  • Jog 1 mile (or 10 minutes)
Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2-1/4 miles (or 25 minutes) with no walking.
7 Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.5 miles (or 25 minutes). Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.5 miles (or 25 minutes). Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.5 miles (or 25 minutes).
8 Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.75 miles (or 28 minutes). Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.75 miles (or 28 minutes). Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 2.75 miles (or 28 minutes).
9 Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 3 miles (or 30 minutes). Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 3 miles (or 30 minutes). The final workout! Congratulations! Brisk five-minute warmup walk, then jog 3 miles (or 30 minutes).

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Being the rock is hard work..

Forgive me if I repeat things I have posted before. I just need an outlet.

I'm the rock. I'm the one who is honest when you ask my advice. I will be there for you to hold you up when you are falling down. I will pick you up if you've fallen. I will hold open the door when you have no strength to turn the knob. I will find the silver lining, I will help you focus on it. I am the annoyingly optimistic person that will tell you everything happens for a reason, that no door closes without at least a window being open. That everything will work out and that it may not be what we have in mind, but it will, and it will all be okay, somehow, someway. Well.. at least.. that's who I was. Just a month ago, I was finding that optimism, that positive outlook on my life when everything seemed to be going wrong..

Now, I feel like this rock, that I have been for so many people, it slowly cracking.. small pebbles are falling away.. and I'm having a harder and harder time finding the silver lining. yes, My daughter, my husband, they are my silver lining. But we all know that when it is all said and done, we need a roof over our heads, and the stress to be gone. Are there people out there in worse situations? Yes. Of course. I feel like, no matter what we do right now, nothing is going right..

In the past year we have filed bankruptcy, moved out of our house, my husband is losing his job, my mom left my dad and is going to North Carolina to be with some guy she met online, my dad is losing his job, our Beagle had cancer and we had to put her down, my mom donated a kidney to my uncle (both are well except for my mom's apparent midlife crisis). We just found out our other dog, Amie, which lives with my in-laws, really hurt her back and may need surgery for that, and that the surgery may not even help her. I've had a few emotional breaks over things that have been said to us, by family, about our choices and current situation.. its just.. all too much.

It doesn't sound like a lot, but its all big things. My shoulders and neck are constantly tense. My head hurts 85% of the time. I feel like I'm just floating around. I've lost desire to do anything remotely productive. Trust me, I feel like trying, I tell myself - You've got to get up, get moving. Do the dishes, the laundry, do this or that, and.. well.. I don't. I just.. well, taking a shower takes huge effort most days. I feel like I'm just disconnecting from everything. I'm here. I'm doing what I'm supposed to - because of Bella. She is all that drives me to keep moving forward, but.. I can't cry to her about my feelings. I can't talk to her and yell and scream to get my emotions out. And I feel like all I do when I talk to my friends is complain, and I hate being that person, the one who always just whines about how awful MY life is. The truth is, I don't have anything else to talk about. Sure, Bella is doing great.. I can talk about Bella, but somehow I ALWAYS turn the conversation onto my own problems. I do it unconsciously. And then next thing I know I'm rambling on and on about all my problems. And then I'm like.. crap.. they don't freaking care, because I've told this person all of this before. nothing has changed. Why do I keep just.. repeating myself. It's probably because I just have all these emotions bottled up. And not all of them I feel comfortable sharing, and so I just share the things I do feel like I can share and so.. you hear it over and over.


I'm the rock. I have to hold it together. I have to see the silver lining, to be positive, to keep My family going forward, to go towards and work towards what is positive and good and get through these tough and challenging times.

I need to find my way to God. I know that will help. The problem is, we go to a Catholic church. I wanted to go to other churches, but.. Kevin really wants to be Catholic, because his dad and uncle and half his family is. He feels that is where he should be. Except we can't join because of my stupid first marriage not being able to be annulled because they need information from my ex's family. Makes no freaking sense to me. Why should that matter.. but it does. I haven't done anything because I don't feel that pull into the Catholic Church. I want to go to another church. One that is.. I don't know. I don't know what religion. I just want somewhere I feel a bit more comfortable. That there is less of a feeling that i HAVE to go, and more of a WANT to go. With mass, I feel like there is this big stigma of obligation, you HAVE to be there. If you don't, you should feel horrible and guilty and go confess why you weren't there and I just am not into that. I don't feel like it's where I should be. I dunno..t hats totally off subject from where I started but.. whatever. I'm putting it out there.

So.. a rock, a boulder.. under enough pressure, eventually cracks and starts to crumble. That's how I feel. Like little pieces of me are slowly falling apart.. and all I am able to do it just stand by and watch. I seriously have thought about seeing a therapist or a counselor, or seeing if there is some sort of medication to help me, or something. Because.. I hate feeling like this, but I just can't seem to shake it.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Covergirl Campaign




Sign up on CG's facebook page and you could win some fabulous prizes!
I absolutely love Covergirl Products (I'm not just saying that, either! ). So check it out and maybe you'll win! If you do, by chance, win the trip to see Ellen, i fully expect for you to bring me with you! ;)

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Opinions.. everyone has one. A post about Social Networking.

So, I'm on Facebook. i've been on facebook. I love to post things, somedays i post a lot of random stuff, some days I post nothing. I know some people hate that I post randomness, and others love it.

My page is private, so if you aren't my friend, you can't see it, and you *shouldn't* be able to search for me either. It's been like that for a while now, pretty much shortly after I created it. I don't want random people on my page. It's that simple. i know who is on the list, so I know who I'm posting to.

I know that what I post - where I am, where I went, where I'm going, who I'm with, what i'm doing, everything - is open for opinions by those who read it. That is fine, I'm aware of that and I have no problem with that. Everyone has opinions, there's no getting around it. Some people like to tell me their opinions, and, i'm okay with that, even if I don't agree with it, I'm okay that they tell me. I prefer that they tell me, actually.

What i've realized i'm NOT okay with, is if they tell everyone else, and then somehow i hear that they've been sharing this opinion (good or bad) with mutual friends and people we know, and not with me. This is where I find problems. This is what truly bugs me. you see, I come from a family where we don't keep opinions to ourselves. We also don't run around and talk to everyone else about it either. I was raised that if I have something to say, I will say it. Now, my dad is reserved, and has always been good about what he says and how he says it. My mom, on the other hand, has no filter. For a long time, as a teenager, i also lacked that filter. As i've grown, I've learned that i can still say what i think, but in a way that isn't obnoxious and over-the-top. Occasionally that filter slips. Something comes out the wrong way with the wrong tone. Most people I know say something to me, either right there, or off to the side later on. Some people I'm sure just assume that that is just how I am and accept it. I know there are some people who find it terribly troubling, but can't confront me for whatever reason, but also have no problem telling everyone else about it.

Regardless of whatever anyone's reasons for their actions, I prefer to just be confronted. i cannot help myself to be a better person, if i am not given constructive criticism.

Facebook is a funny creature. you have friends, family, acquaintances, strangers. We all have different levels of what we share and don't share. Because of recent events, I've decided that facebook is for my moms club friends and a few select other friend who, without facebook, i'd have no other means of communication.

Anyhow, if you have an opinions about that, or this post, or my hair, or where i was last tuesday, kindly leave a comment. Or text me, or call me. But please, don't tell all your friends about it. Or, even if you do, tell me too. Thanks.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Two Years ago..

Two years ago, on this day, at 10:38 am, my precious little girl was born. She was beautiful and amazing, and ever since then she has been teaching me just as much as I've been teaching her. She's just about 30lbs, and i believe 33" tall. Her checkup isn't for another week, so I don't have the exact numbers.. but I will. =) She wears a 2T in shirts and pants, a few 3T shirts.. and size 7 shoe. Her hair hangs just above her shoulder blades on her back, and her bangs come down to her chin. Her hair is always a mess, and it's a challenge to keep it out of her face, yet I refuse to cut it.



Bella can speak very well for her age.  She knows a lot of animals, and their sounds. Her favorite animals seem to be Lemurs and Zebras, but she also likes tigers and monkeys. Her favorite shows are Yo Gabba Gabba, Caillou, The Wiggles, and Timmy Time. She also like a short cartoon that comes on in between shows called "Monkey See, Monkey Do".  She is getting into princesses and Tinkerbell. We are doing a themed party this year with Disney Faeries.  I'm sure she would be happy with anything, but this seemed to be the most convenient. Plus, she was super excited when we picked out the plates.


She enjoys music and dancing, and even more than that she loves books. She loves to "read" them, or have them read to her. She loves to be outside when the weather is nice, and she really enjoys playing with other kids.

She has a quick temper, which proves to be a challenge to deal with. We are working on finding the right way to combat her fits and temper. They usually fizzle out quickly if we ignore her, so that's what we try to do. Although, do you have any idea how hard it is to ignore a toddler who is screaming AND chasing you down?

She's learning colors and numbers, and shapes too. She can count to 3, knows red, blue, and yellow, and can also identify a square and a star.  Finger painting and coloring have really helped with her colors and gross motor skills.  She can jump off the ground, and has been able to for a few months. She has all but her last two top molars, and she eats just about anything we give her. I have found out she does not like raisins or jello though!

So, as we celebrate another wonderful year with Bella, I am reflecting on not only what she has learned, but what I have learned as well.

She has taught me patience, and acceptance. She has taught me to trust my own instincts. She has taught me to appreciate life, and the people around me. I do alot of things differently, I shop, cook, and eat differently.  I sacrifice more, although, it doesn't necessarily feel like a sacrifice. It feels good to me to give her more, and take less for myself. I s'pose that's part of being a mom, but it's just another way I've changed in the last two years. She makes me want to be a better person all around. She's made me appreciate Kevin, and that he is here for us.  She, without knowing, encourages me to be more open and communicate more in my relationship with Kevin.  It is something I've not always been great at, but I'm working on it. I want our relationship to be a good and healthy example for her.

But.. it's her birthday. She's going to be two. Two. It just doesn't seem right that she's two already. It makes me cry.. she's so big and smart and beautiful.. and I'm so proud.. but.. where did my baby go? I guess the way mother nature eases this little twinge of pain is that this is the stage where she wants only mommy for everything. I must get her out of her carseat. I must be the one to put on her socks and shoes (and change her diaper and get her dressed, for that matter). If she drops her cup from her high chair, daddy better not touch it!! Mommy to the rescue. So, while I may complain that she is stuck to me like glue and I can't get a break, I try to remind myself that there will be a day that she won't want anything to do with me, and so I must pause and help her with whatever she needs, or just hold her if that's what she wants... because all too soon she'll be a teenager, and she'll be yelling at me and telling me to leave her alone.